Swami Yogananda said that when you meditate upon God, you begin to feel his presence. When I meditate upon the divine mother I feel great joy and I am convinced that it’s her presence, but then doubt enters in my mind that it is just an illusion, I have faith but sometimes it doesn’t work. what to do in such a situation?
When doubt assails you, say simply to Divine Mother: “I love you. Naughty or good, blessed with your joy or clouded in doubt, I will always love You. Whether I know you are with me, or whether you seem to abandon me, I am yours always.”
Yogananda says that we must be willing to wait, a thousand years if need be, before Divine Mother comes to us yet remain steadfast and true. The story is told of Chaitanya that once, in an ecstatic mood, he was revealing to his disciples how long it would be before each one achieved God-realization. At one point he declared that a particular disciple, in fact a person considered his most advanced disciple, would know God after a thousand more lifetimes. The other disciples were horrified. Later they discovered this disciple outside on the porch dancing in joy, crying, “Did you hear guruji say I would find God?” The other disciples were amazed. Then Chaitanya called that disciple back into the house and, touching him on the forehead, the disciple went into samadhi! Turning to the other disciples, Chaitanya said, “Do you see now what it takes? Affirm that you have Divine Mother NOW!”
Yogananda has a chant “I Will Be Thine Always.” It includes these lines:
I may go far, farther than the stars,
But I will be Thine always.
When I die, look into my eyes,
They will mutely say,
‘I will be Thine always.’
God is as much with you now as ever can be. You need only improve your “knowing.”
Rejoice in Him!